Today we’re going to discuss the importance of the expectations that you have for your child.
Children live up to our expectations. All children do this. This means, if your child is being honest and a good boy or a good girl, they will improve their behavior to live up to our expectations.
On the other hand, if you feel like your child is basically dishonest, not truthful, has a behavior problem, or has some other things wrong; your child is going to fill your expectations that way also.
So it is very important that we have positive expectations for our children.
You have to really truly believe that your child can achieve these expectations. I know it is sometimes very hard. You have a child that has been lying and stealing, but if you view the child as honest he will become honest.
On the other hand, if he feels that he is being a bad child, or a dishonest child, or a liar, he is going to stay being a liar or worse. It is all because of what you expect from your child and how you view your child.
I will tell you a story that I heard. There was a child who was passed around from home to home, and eventually ended up at his grandmother’s house. His grandmother was blind.
He came home one day with a report card. He was a failure at school all his life. He would receive mostly D’s and F’s.
One day the grandmother asked him what his grades were on his most recent report card. She asked him how he did.
So he lied. He told her that he said he got all A’s. She can’t see. So she believed him. She was so proud of him. She was so happy that he was such a good student. She gave him such positive warmth and attention because of the good grades.
He had never received this type of attention from any before. As result of that one interaction, he became a straight A student just because that is what his grandmother expected of him.
Again, it is very important to understand our expectations do shape our children’s behavior. It has to be real. You have to really view your child as being good and honest. This is how he will become good and honest.
If you really believe that your child is a liar or is a bad child, then he is going to be a liar or a bad child. It is really up to you.
